2 More Die in Service to Mankind
Two more idiots served mankind yesterday by permanently removing their DNA from the gene pool by trying to swim at Prettyboy Reservoir.
For those of you not familiar with Prettyboy (allegedly named for a horse), it is a very deep, very very cold resevoir in Northwestern Baltimore County that serves two purposes: a backup for Loch Raven (near Towson) and to keep the Gunpowder temperature at the right level for Brown Trout.
Prettyboy's water is unnaturally cold-- some say that it usually only takes minutes for even good swimmers to become immobilized due to the temperature drop just a foot or so below the service. It is not spring fed-- therefore, it doesn't benefit from that nice 57 degree regulation that spring-fed lakes benefit from.
But, no matter how signs they put up that say "Hey, dumbass, no swimming", there is always a moron willing to serve humanity by diminishing the amount of mongoloid DNA in the national gene pool.
So, thanks too you two nameless morons for your service to the country. The bill for the five hour search to recover your bodies will be sent to your families.